Oh sweet friends, my heart desperately wishes this chapter weren’t so applicable in my life. But it is. (I wrote more on that earlier in the week as we introduced this chapter.)
One area, especially, where doubt whispers “Not good enough” to me is in the area of motherhood.
It’s so common for moms to question themselves and their parenting abilities. Yet today, as I celebrate the birthday of my youngest daughter, I’m very aware that just like a corporate employee can improve in her job skills, moms can gain skills and confidence in our roles as well. Moms can, and do, get better through the years. (Separately … maybe there needs to be some kind of an “It Gets Better Project” for young moms??! We’ll save that for another day.)
Our kids value and appreciate us far more than we realize. We may cut ourselves short or stare at our limitations as failures, but they don’t see that. They see cuddles and hugs and laughter and life and love.
This video really encapsulates that idea. It’s gone viral and is sooo amazingly sweet and encouraging to every mom who wonders if what she’s doing even matters…
Additionally, not only is it a myth to think we can ever achieve perfection as parents, it’s also a myth to believe it’s even necessary. The fantastically good news is, I don’t ever have to be “good enough” as a mom on my own. Because of Jesus, #WhoIAm is good enough.
And lest I forget, here’s a letter I could imagine God wrote to my younger self as a reminder:
Dear sweet child,
I love you. You may not always feel like that’s true, but it is. In fact, I’m crazy about you.
And I want you to know that I see you making attempts every day to be there for your children. I see that. And it matters. Every bit of effort that you pour into your child is going to make a difference in their worlds.
When your kids tell you about their special art project, or talk so proudly about kicking a home run in the kickball recess game, or share their hearts about the friend who’s facing difficulties … it’s because they value you, and your opinion of them matters far more than you’ll ever know.
When your teenager stays home from school with a cold, and you bring her hot cider to calm her sore throat … when your birthday girl’s face lights up because of the photo slide show you make her each and every year … it absolutely cements the bond that you have. And that is a great thing.
But I also see you trying to get this parenting thing all right, all the time. And you need to know that is simply impossible. Because you’re a human. I am God, and you are not. So quit trying to be perfect and give yourself some grace. Your kids don’t need to worship you. They need to worship Me. They need to see my Son Jesus in your life. And that alone can sustain them on some very dark and trying days.
I sent Jesus to the planet so He could pay the ultimate sacrifice. So all of your efforts are not in vain, but you don’t need to be good enough because based on your merit alone, you could never be good enough.
Only Jesus can be good enough. And you’ve got to get your “good enough” from Him.
Remember my word tells you in Colossians 1:13-14 that I have rescued you from dead-end alleys and darkness, and transferred you into the Kingdom of my dear Son, who got you out of the pit you were in, got rid of the sins you were doomed to keep repeating.
My word tells you that you have been chosen and adopted into my family; you are free from condemnation and could never be separated from my love. Because of Jesus, you have been given a spirit of power, love, and a sound mind. You are my child and my masterpiece. You can do all things parental only because of Jesus, who gives you the strength you need just to make it through the day.
Take these words and meditate on them. Let them sink deep into your soul, and allow them to transform you.
Stay the course, stay focused on the truth, and in time you will thank Me for this reminder today.
Be blessed, my child, as you are blessing others. And one day … those kids of yours? They’ll rise up, and call you blessed. You’lll earn their praise. But more importantly, you will hear mine.